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Brown Goop & My Bucket-less shower

by - 7:50 AM


I'm not quite sure why blogging sounds appealing at times when I should be taking advantage of a quiet house and sleeping, but here I am, with motivation to fill you in on the last month [I know, I know] of my life in Jordan. I've come to realize that things seem less blog-worthy to me now that i'm becoming used to life in Amman. Things that seemed gareeb [weird, strange] are now 3adee [normal, it is what it is]. Regardless, i'm going to start off by telling you about my day, since conquering the last month is sounding a tad overwhelming and un-amusing. It's finals in Amman, which unlike the US, means that you're going to study your ass off and still get a crappy score because Arab teachers are the hitler of grades...Imagine the motivation there. I had my first final today in fusha Arabic, and decided to reward myself by getting a gym membership [sarcasm]. Four months late is better than never, right? All the falafel, 7alaweyat [Arab desserts], and shawarma are overstaying their welcome. I joined a women-only gym, which serves not only as a social place for Jordanian women to dress freely without the hijab and get their nails done, but occasionally they work out. It looks exactly like a gym in America, and people wear shorts...SHORTS! Remember those? The only difference is they blast Arabic-European music and play Turkish soaps on the TV instead of Real Housewives of Orange County. Forget my workout, the important part of this story is my shower. Today was the first time in 4 months that i've taken a comfortably hot, bucket-less, long shower. A little background info: Now that it's winter, we have to boil a big pot of water on the stove, mix it with cold water from the shower, and proceed to bathe by taking a bucket and attempting to wash your hair with one hand while dumping the bucket over your head with the other. I've mastered the art of bucket-style showering by now, but my near hypothermic showering experience last weekend put me over the edge...thus, the purchase of my gym-membership. And let me tell you, my shower today was worth every single dinar. I could actually wash my hair with two hands while a constant stream of hot water hit my body! At one point I was so excited, I moved it like Bernie [Youtube it]...It was glorious. Aside the fact that I forgot shower flip-flops and got death glares from all the Jordanian women (feet are a super touchy subject here, and instead of saying something, people will show their disapproval of your bare feet by bluntly stopping what they are doing, and staring), a gym membership was definitely in the top 5 best decisions i've made thus far. After the gym, I proceeded to pamper myself and get my lawn-length leg hair sugared for 6 JD [now that I can wear shorts and wanted to feel like a girl again]. Sugaring is a natural form of wax, which looks like a blob of something you'd make in 5th grade science class. I was expecting somewhat of a US salon experience where they lead you into a room, tell you to undress, go under a blanket, they knock on the door, come in, etc...nope. I was led to a room with half of a room divider up, barely separating me from people getting pedicures, and the Arab woman looked at me like "c'mon white girl, strip!" So there I go, takin' off my pants in front of 6 Arab women, while she says something that can closest be translated to, "Oh God, OH GOD, your legs are like my husbands." Well, I hope your husband has nice legs. I awkwardly laid on the table with 6 Arab woman staring at me while the woman [Salima was her name], rubbed this brown goop on my leg. Without warning, Salima ripped [I don't know if the word 'ripped' gives justice the amount of force used] the brown goop off of me while I instinctively used her arm as a stress ball. Experience #500,042 that makes me wish I was a guy. The whole time I was picturing my mom saying, "beauty is pain!" and  trying to calculate which falafel place was cheapest by the time I took a taxi there...anything, to keep my mind of Salima and the damn brown goop.

I'm going to try and post more frequently! Be sure to leave a comment down below...it makes me ibtesim [smile :)] (See earlier post for easy instructions on how to post a comment)

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2 comments

  1. OMG love the Bernie reference. Jordan doesn't sound like a place I'd want to live lol you are brave for sure.

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  2. so ive been uber busy with school and not really been on you tube much, but i was like ohh ima look up taylaa, i havnt watched her videos in a while, to only find out your not even in america right now, so ive been reading your blogs, which is strange bc i NEVER read peoples blogs, and it seems like its a great experience.. the coffee blog had me legit lol. hope all is well over there and your doing good in school. do you ever miss home?? keep it real- xoxolilmissfefe

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